10 On Air Travel

Then Achmed the travel agent said, But what of air travel?
And he answered:

It has been brought to my attention that your two national airlines are to be merged under the banner of a puppet corporation to be passed over into the hands of a foreign empire. I ask myself: Why is this so odious to the people of Orphalese?

Your national symbol is the fig leaf, is it not? It graces the tail fins of all the planes of your national airline, instilling a rare sense of national pride at every port of call. But all this is mere illusion, for your proud national carrier was privatized long ago.

And is the Jumbo Jet not a magnificent testament to the powers of engineering? That such a graceful beast should fly. Wherever you may travel, you will see these stellar griffins bearing your fig leaf for all the word to behold. And you may count your nation among the magnificent ones. And you may count your country among those favored by God.

(The crowd in general, and Achmed in particular seemed very pleased to hear this.)

And this is why there is outrage over the impending loss of your national symbol to a foreign corporate giant, though the carrier in question ceased to be national the moment the people themselves ceased to own it.

It had to be sacrificed, for it is a well known fact that public corporations cannot be profitable lest they be in the business of stripping the environment of its natural resources. Even then they have a penchant for turning in losses.

Verily this is so, for it is economic imperatives, not governments, that rule the world. Lamenting the perceived loss of your national pride is futile. The world economy is blinder than justice, controlled by no woman or man, and accountable to no one.

Here No one’s head briefly jerked to attention, roused from a mild stupor. Alas, he had not been addressed directly. The prophet still spoke:

In this world, the big fish must needs swallow the smaller ones, ad infinitum. This is unfortunate, for it is often the littlest fish that serve the needs of the people best. The colossal foreign airline that will be the ghost flying your national symbol does not represent a foreign interest, any more than it represents your interests. It is simply the bigger fish. Multinational corporations are entities unto themselves. If you crave a piece of the pie, you are always free to buy shares.